Friday, July 06, 2007

Reason why I need to find a new job # 86

On my desk this morning I discovered a small tube. Oooh, thought I, gifties! How really very extremely unusual [I work for tightarses, you see]! The tube, when I inspected it, read ‘The ThinPrep PapTest: One vial, More results’. This disturbed me somewhat as I could only come up with one connection between small tubes and pap smears and I was really quite concerned about the kind of gift that was being left on my desk. The back was more revealing. It read ‘Supercare hand lotion: Specially formulated aftercare lotion for glove wearers’.

It was quite good timing, actually, my hands were all cracked and I quite needed some hand cream and so I applied.

Never before have I used a hand cream that made my vagina clench.

Still, I’ve had that experience now.

3 comments:

nailpolishblues said...

Also, it looks like guacamole and smells like a doctor's office.

The hand cream that is.

Caz said...

I'm really glad you cleared that up.

Now, if your kindly management left this gift only for you, I would suggest: GET OUT NOW.

If they left this kindly gift for all of the women, I would suggest: GET OUT NOW.

SAVE YOUR VAGINA FIRST!

YOU CAN GET A JOB ANYWHERE.

On the other hand, if someone was passing out free samples at the train station and they thought this was a cheap way to provide "gifts" to staff, well, there may be slightly less urgency to leaving your current work place.

Next week you might get a muesli bar, or some panty liners, or mouth wash.

nailpolishblues said...

One of my colleagues got a pen instead. Same company, alas. It's nicely weird advertising but somewhat misdirected - now if they were offering free thinpreps...

I think I do need a new job. Sperm counts and STDs just aren't as amusing as they used to be.