Tuesday, October 23, 2007

And then I thought some.

I was sitting here feeling all sorry for myself about having done not very much this weekend. You know lack of accomplishment kills me – this is why I am a loser with a capital ‘l’ – capitals in titles always make things look more impressive. Anyway, pan to my sitting here, frumpy, hair unwashed, in trackies [oh shut up], and wasting time feeling sorry for myself because I got too tired to finish the cleaning and have left the flat looking like something exploded [one more Saturday shift and I will but that’s a whole other story]. And then I sat here and thought about what I’ve actually done today. Hell, I got up before midday on a Monday – that’s my Sunday, before midday, awake, me! That possibly makes more of an impression on the people who know what a champion sleeper I am. I also kicked the arses of some tasks that have been waiting months or years for me to get ‘round to. I’m actually getting my tax done this year – I made an actual appointment – my sister, frequently unbearable as older sisters so often are, has been absolutely hideous since she started working for the tax office and would have been positively grotesque if I’d left it another year. I do believe that she goes out of her way to find things to nag me about. Like a mother only three years older than me and able to punch like a man [this is what happens when men don’t have sons – they teach their little princesses to hit – hard]. Making appointments is quite hard work that was the beginning of the end really. After that I phoned the bank to, ah, sort out my finances. Ah, fools, ever willing to bail me out – unlike my parents – and with a lesser rate of interest. That was an entertaining conversation largely because I didn’t know that I could do virtually everything over the phone and because I managed to sound like a fuckwit on several occasions. For example, on being asked how much I grossed etc I had to reply that I didn’t actually know – this was made marginally better by the fact that I don’t know because I’ve just gotten a pay rise [yes, Rins, pick yourself up off the floor] and I have yet to discover exactly how much money I’ll lose in tax HECS etc. Also, me and basic calculations? Surely you jest! I also couldn’t name my real estate agents. Hey, I can’t remember everything now, can I?

Aside from this too-exciting too-much information, oh wait, I’m continuing with the too much information, I’ve managed to wash the dust and aviation fuel of the better part of thirty years from the rather decrepit Venetians, sort out the books, launder everything – except for that one towel [blue] that I accidentally mistook for the carpet [brown], and, um, sit around and stuff. I also bought baby shower stuff which was every bit as trying as it was tiring. Quickly, is there etiquette for a baby shower that I ought to know about? I’m guessing abortion and disabilities are well out…and dying young, of course. Oh crap, it was easier when we were having an unofficial family feud – then I just didn’t get invited to the birthdays and baby showers and fuck only knows what. Still, you know, family…*cries*

Now I’m running out of time and energy, I really must reserve some energy else I’ll have to sleep on bare mattress. Very uncivilised.

Oh shit, the washing!

10 comments:

M L Jassy said...

Nails, I am so lazy after a weekend of over-accomplishment that I can't even be bothered to make the bed and I'm kipping on a sleeping bag. So be warned - productivity during weekends leads to being "fagged out" by Monday.

Dan said...

That is more than I have accomplished in the past month plus. If I was wearing a hat, I would tip it to you like I was Bogart. I bet he didn't clean shit for most of his life! But, I can't be mad at him. I love him so.

Anonymous said...

Cleaning the blinds? That's hardcore.

Baby showers suck. What a nightmare - unwrapping lots of crap presents in front of people and feigning excitement. And then trying to return everything without receipts. Ugh.

Shelley said...

Mitzi, I cope better with work if I'm tired. I'd feel better if I'd managed to finish everything I had planned - oh well.

Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan - fix your blog it eats my comments then spits me out! I do not like this. I'm sure you've done much more than you think. Probably. possibly...

Mumma, I still have the living room ones to go. Utterly revolting but mayeb I'll sneeze less i there isn't so much dust around. Oh crap, they are so not getting receipts - I don't need them to know how cheap I am! Baby showers just seem a little silly to me. Also, terribly hard to buy for someone who isn't born yet [someones - she's having two].

M L Jassy said...

Hmm, I can only guess at your work (having not researched or, as conversationslists are wont to do, ask)- posturepedic mattress tester? Dream manufacturer? Ah, it must be Doona Quality Control Officer.

Shelley said...

I am a phone whore for the medical profession.

I dream manufacture as a hobby.

Dan said...

Holy crap! I had no clue! I put up a different anti-spammy thing. And to think, I thought people just didn't like my place. Turns out I suck.

JahTeh said...

Damn, I'm sitting here reading this and I haven't changed the sheets. I'll just forget until tomorrow, I'm good at forgetting.

Shelley said...

Dan, no, no, we love you but your blog's a bit fucked. I tried to comment but it wouldn't let me see the word verification thing so I gave up. Damn thing clearly hates me.

JahTeh, I never manage to get anything done on work days, except work, of course, and educating my trainee about the Australian political system [virgin voter!] and sexually harrassing him [JOKE]. Nothing after I get home really.

Dan said...

Whoa, ok. But it's such a nice little script. Removing in progress.