I feel utterly defeated. I'm tired. I rattle from all the painkillers. I'm fed up. And the episode of Torchwood I just watched scared the shit out of me even though I'm nearly thirty-one years old and don't actually believe in fairies.
And I'm sitting here crying because I feel so defeated. Like a child. Sobbing into my hands.
I look like hell. I feel like hell. I wonder if I'll ever feel human again.
And despite my best intentions this reads like a suicide note.
Dear you, fuck me, I'm off to die or cry or something so lame it can't be mentioned in polite society. Fuck this life, no, really, fuck it.
I feel like I've been kicked in the gut. I only have a few painkillers left.
And I'm so fucking pathetic that I'm posting this on my blog.