Saturday, May 27, 2006

Localised dullness.

There was a boy, on the bus home last night, who was rather determinedly reading Chomsky. I’d given up all thought of reading so late and on such a busy bus. I’d taken to listening to Nick Cave and trying to determine the nature of the relationship of the couple in front of me. When I (finally) got off the bus I left all three behind but was still slightly preoccupied with wondering about them as people. I love to imagine what other people are like. It’s great fun until you accidentally do it to someone you know and they turn out to be a bit crap in reality.
Today I terrified a woman who phoned to try and make me give money to charity. I answered the phone slightly irritably because I thought it would be my mother with whom I am presently annoyed and then flatly refused to play the game. I tried to be polite but there was a real ‘fuck off’ edge to my voice as I demanded to know where she had gotten my number before telling her that I simply wasn’t interested. I then hung up before she could make me feel guilty.
The other reason I was slightly cranky was that I’d just been finishing off the most recent Harry Potter which I’d had to reread after coming across this discussion. I have come to one conclusion about Harry Potter and it is that J.K. Rowling really shits me. Make that two conclusions – I heart Neville for being so completely hopeless and always ending up in the fray.
Lastly, I made a new friend today – a little cat called, most unimaginatively, Tiger. I came across Tiger having the most awesome upside down washing session in a car park and we clicked immediately. We got along so well (I do give fabulous ear scratches) that Tiger tried to follow me to the shops which was where I was headed. What I found really rockingly good about Tiges was that his collar read: Please don’t feed. I do love a cat that can con meals out of strangers and this was one kitty that did poor waif well.

18 comments:

phishez said...

The whole kitty thing - I can imagine my little girl doing somethig like that. Running up to you, weaving about your legs, then gettting about two feet in front of you and rolling on the ground so you can rub her belly.

Of course the moment you touch her she steals part of your sould and puts it with her soul collection... right next to her toy mice.

Damn Devil Cat.

Shelley said...

I think my soul belongs entirely to my cat - she'd cause a major bitch fight if some other kitty stole bits of her humans. She's one tough little psycho...er...I mean cat.

Anonymous said...

Chomsky is a twit, but you rock.

Shelley said...

Aw shucks.


Wait, what the fuck does that mean anyway?

Anonymous said...

I don't know. I guess I can't go five minutes without bashing Chomsky. He sucks that much. Did you see that thing on TV the other night where it was an hour and a half of people kissing his butt? Man I hate that guy. You rock tho, Shelley!

Shelley said...

I never see anything on telly - nothing before 11pm or after midday, anyway.

I meant 'aw shucks' but your explanations were wildly entertaining.

Unknown said...

One thing I don't miss about having a home phone: people trying to sell me shit or trying to get money from me.

I've never gotten into Harry Potter. I'll admit I like the movies (especially the last one) but I read the first book and it didn't sucker me in enough to read any more.

Pomgirl said...

It's such a simple thing to do but I've never thought to put Do Not Feed on my cat's tag. I suppose I thought that people would look at his ample girth and know not to feed him. But I suspect people who do not have such excellent cat ear scratching skills could use food to try and win his heart.

He does smell of poo so perhaps they wouldn't bother.

Anonymous said...

Then you tell me why women are attratced to idiot men? I really mean it. I know a guy who actually has read books that teach you how to read body language and become the "alpha male" in the crowd etc. Now as sick, and sad as that is, and as fucked up an individual the poor ponse is, he pulls women like a magnet. I can see what wanker the man, is, now how come the women cant? Is there some genetic principle at work here?

Shelley said...

Dan, again, I wonder at what women you are talking about. Personally, I'm not big on 'alpha males' nor anyone who thinks of themselves so highly and exudes such ego.
Personally, I've frequently wondered at men who are attracted to idiot women but since many idiot women and idiot women get it together I figure it all kind of equals out.
Attraction is a fascinating thing, isn't it?

Shelley said...

Marina - I never even thought about not having a home phone but I got very excited at the idea when you mentioned it. Still, it might be overkill now...
Not like the Harry Potter books? My head oh my aching head!!!

Pomgirl - my sister used to have a cat who could've used such a tag. Mind you, that cat ate like a horse [volume, not contents] and was skinny like a greyhound. She was also very very stupid [cat, not so much sister] and possibly didn't get the concept of a full stomach..or chewing..or 'No!'
I probably wouldn't notice if the cat smelt like poo - cats make me sneeze so I try not to get my nose to close to them.

Shelley said...

While I'm sure that this: since many idiot women and idiot women get it together, is true - I actually meant to say idiot men and idiot women....
Too much vodka last night, I'm afraid.

Anonymous said...

Dont you just hate people who dont have any courage! I simply cant stand individuals who are afraid to take chances.

(vent, vent, vent, vent - fucking coward shareholders - vent, vent, vent)

Thanks for your time!

Anonymous said...

Hi there,

I am a new blogger, and I really enjoy your site.

I am not sure of how to set things up on my onw site yet (i.e. profile, hit counter, pics etc.) but I am learning.

Please have a look at my site and give me some feed back.

I tried to make contact with girlblogetc, but I think that she thinks I am a stalker (which I am not)

Thanks

Jason
alternativeresistance.blogspot

LuSh said...

my pussy(of the cat variety) had 2 bells on his collar and was a docile twat when in company of humans) when only in the company of animals he'd eat them alive and bring em home to brag.

Oh how i miss him

Shelley said...

It's always so nice when people come to one's blog and are cryptic. Thank you, Dan.

Jason, yes, you do come across a tiny bit stalkerish... I am afraid that if you need technical advice you're barking up the wrong tree - I haven't a clue and I have no memory for technical stuff. Try closing your eyes and hitting some buttons - that's how I've gotten to here. Unimpressive, isn't it?

Lish, I love a hunter kitty [so long as they're discriminatory and don't bring home natives..] - it's like having a good old fashioned cave man around only with better grooming. Also, I love that thing where you can pick them up and tease them when they shit you - cats, not men.

Anonymous said...

Not stalkerish, just free of mind. Not confined by insecurity or fear

Anonymous said...

I do to have a blog site,

www.alternativeresistance.blogspot.com