Saturday, August 15, 2009

And another thing.

Another thing wrong with my job is that I spend far to much time talking to men who are either just about to masturbate or are planning when they're next going to masturbate. Or their attempts to get laid sans prophylactic.

I mean, I don't just talk to men and assume that they're thinking about these things, they phone me up and discuss such things with me. Especially on Saturdays.

I'm really starting to hate working Saturdays.

8 comments:

Dan the VespaMan said...

I wouldn't know how to deal with this. I'm too polite and would say something like "that's nice" or "all the best with that". All the while I would be thinking "why can't these wankers just keep it to themselves?".

Sometimes I hate being tolerant.

Shelley said...

You get quite used to it after a while, Dan.

You should hear me rant - after I get off the phone, of course - when they really annoy me.

JahTeh said...

I hope you tell them to wash their hands after. I mean why haven't they got a blog to talk to or put it on twitter?
It could be worse Nails, you could have a vid phone.

Shelley said...

JahTeh, such conversations are pretty much a part of my job. However, discussing semen analysis - particularly the whole collection thing can be terribly awkward. Usually, it's far more awkward for the men - especially as it has to be in the lab within an hour and, no, you're really not allowed to have help with that. And yes, we'll have a fair idea if your girlfriend/wife's mouth helped you out. Sorry.

Maria said...

I remember working at a radio station when Jennifer Hawkins came in to be interviewed. She said hi briefly to me (I was a little answer-the-phones-gal in an office in the corridor) and then all these guys started talking about how it was so unfair and they wanted to meet Hawko and then started going into the errr details of their fantasies and what they'd like to do to her, and it was quite explicit. Like being around a lot of guys wanking. A group wank-off.

Another older female came past and said to them, "Why do you think she said hello to Maria and not you guys, then?"

Maria said...

"Sometimes I hate being tolerant."

Dan, maybe you need to change.

You need to go to a help group and find out how to become a more intolerant bastard self. It's not being fake, it's just helping yourself to be a better, more intolerant self. The kind of self you'd LIKE to be.

Some people find it easy to be intolerant bastards, but others need to make the effort. That's ok. There are others willing to help you get in touch with that intolerance inside you just wanting to get out and express itself ... if only you'll let it. Don't suppress it!

My WV is nerse. A nerdy nurse?

Maria said...

" mean why haven't they got a blog to talk to or put it on twitter?"

They're wankers who feel too icky about dirtying their nice keyboard after that.

Shelley said...

They're wankers to a particular purpose and I do understand their concerns - it's simply that I'd prefer that they'd channel their concerns into the appropriate container as they've so nicely managed with other things.